Summer In Paris

Yesterday evening, Natalie and I had originally intended to go to an opera, but the last minute tickets were pricier than expected. However, there is always something to do in Paris, so we decided to check out Shakespeare & Company, Paris's most famous English language bookstore and the one with the most impressive history. When we came out of the metro at Place St. Michel, we saw a pretty excellent fountain.



There were a lot of people gathered around to watch some kind of street performance, so we took a peek and saw these guys breakdancing/doing capoeira/something.



I haven't talked much about this before, but Paris is jam-packed with street performers of various kinds. There are living statues at Sacre Coeur, dancers in public squares, and musicians in the metro who are more than willing to give you an involuntary concert experience. These musicians range from apparently legal, fairly decent violinists in the metro tunnels to crappy accordion players who board your car on the train, play for a few minutes, and then walk up and down the aisle asking for money. There are also women who carry signs begging for help, saying they are mothers or grandmothers attempting to care for multiple kids.

The most disturbing performance I have witnessed was that of a hunched, elderly woman, dressed all in black. She trundled onto the train wearing no shoes, only these black socks on her stubby feet. With the hunch she barely reached my chest. Once she boarded the train and it started moving, she starting wailing and singing some kind of dirge, holding out a coin purse to everyone around her. It was pretty disturbing.

The most awesomely bad performance I have been subjected to involved an accordion player who only played "Yesterday" and "My Way," over and over again. He had a machine that played most of the music for him, so he only had to do the melody (and perhaps he didn't even play that himself). I was on that train for a long time, so as the guy moved from car to car, I would hear Frank Sinatra echoing in the station whenever we stopped and the doors opened.

Anyway, Shakespeare & Company was AWESOME. It is an adorable store that is absolutely crammed with books. Some are used, some are new, and there are always little nooks and crannies where you can sit and read them. There is a library of sorts on the upper floor and where I found people stashed away in all the corners.



I bought myself a book that I intend to enjoy in a garden this evening. Parisians and I definitely have similar ideas about having fun. Lots of young people here like to get something to eat and drink, sit in a park somewhere, and either read or talk to friends. Works for me!

Random News

The RAI is wrapping up today, and I have had a great time! I ended up making a few new friends, having some great conversations, and listening to some interesting talks. My favorite part of being at the conference was watching old friends from around the world get excited to see each other. Maybe one day I will have friends like that!

And, for your enjoyment, here are my two favorite quotes from the paper giving sessions:

One woman, talking about medicine, stated that many treatments "involve purging through the mouth or anus, which will be dealt with in detail." (It was interesting!)

And, in response to a discussion in which sexual taboos and seeing family members in the afterlife were both mentioned: "Let us all hope to meet our relatives in the afterlife, but not to sleep with them."

And though I didn't get to see this paper, my favorite title, because of its sheer nerdiness, was "Copular Biclausal Constructions." Go philology!

In other news, you know how I joked early on in this blog that my host family might be related to that great witticist, Francois de la Rochefoucauld? Well... it turns out that they ARE! Here is a delightful quote of la Rochefoucauld's to remind you of his awesomeness:

I have ability. I have no hesitation in saying it, as for what purpose should I pretend otherwise. So great circumvention, and so great depreciation, in speaking of the gifts one has, seems to me to hide a little vanity under an apparent modesty, and craftily to try to make others believe in greater virtues than are imputed to us. On my part I am content not to be considered better-looking than I am, nor of a better temper than I describe, nor more witty and clever than I am.

Later members of this illustrious family were important public figures in France, and even built a hospital. As it happens, I passed it the other day!



Pretty cool, huh?

Ads of Paris!

While I am listening to talks about Ugaritic scribes, ancient adoption practices, and exorcisms (looking forward to that one!), I figured you guys would rather read about something else. So here it is -- Ads of Paris! Those of you who followed my Berlin blog know that I enjoy collecting photos of strange advertisements and posting them on the internet, and this summer is no different.

First up is the very first ad I noticed in Paris as I rode the metro from the airport.



Let me tell you, this is exactly the guy I need to tell me about getting the same electrical power but at a lower price. Those powerful biceps combined with that feather-thin hair... he's like a downgrade from Steven Seagal. Lower price? Indeed. Same power? I think not!

Paris is also filled with ads directed at those hoping to beef up their English language skills. Most talk about the "95% Oral" method or feature smiling men and women affirming, "Yes! I speak Wall Street English!" But these guys took a different tack:



That's right, everyone. STOP BUTCHERING YOUR ENGLISH! There's another version of the ad featuring a beat-up Scotsman. I love it.

I'm not sure what to make of this next one. All I can say is, "To the limits," indeed, because he's definitely pushing mine. Keep your tighty whities to yourself, dude!



This next ad, which appears to be for car insurance, cracks me up.



I admit the photo isn't great, but you can definitely tell that the guy is all exposed and unprotected. What you can't tell, even in person, is that he's unhappy about it. That jaunty tie and "What? I'm naked?" look remind me more of a dude at a frat party looking for an excuse to flash someone. The naked woman in the other version of this ad looks equally willing to roll with it.

Orangina is Fanta's big competitor in this city, and their ads are definitely attention-seeking. Every vending machine is covered with female animals who are given very human figures (including huge breasts) and provocatively posed. There is a particularly slutty looking Zebra, but I'll treat you guys to the giraffe:



She is actually a new member of the Orangina family. Another strange creature I spotted was a sexy cactus! (I swiped this image from the internet, however.)



Somehow sexy plants and animals do not make me thirsty. Your tattoos, however, might get hungry, as I learned from this sandwich promo. When I get that tattoo I'm planning on, I guess I shouldn't get one of anything with a stomach.



France has also taught me how to shop. This fine young lady, for example, is so aggressive that she needs knee pads and combat boots.



My friend, if you really need that flannel shirt, you can have it!

I'm not sure whether I would prefer to spend an evening alone in the doll museum or with this woman:



An upside-down photo of someone grinning manically is inevitably an attempt to say, "Look, I'm wacky and fun!" But the actual message is always, "RUN." Remember that, kids.

And now I will close with the sexiest ad in Paris, mainly because it so prominently features Alan Rickman.

RAI

I am spending a couple of days this week at the RAI, also known as the Rencontre Assyriologique Internationale. It's the annual meeting of the world's Assyriologists and thus, by default, THE happening place to be in Paris this week. So far we have only been through the opening ceremonies and a few talks, but I am quite enjoying myself. Large conferences are generally a place where the young and eager kiss the hems of the old and badass with varying degrees of success. As a non-Assyriologist, I have no utility whatsoever for networkers, meaning that they have no interest in talking to me. More than once I have seen someone's eyes glide blankly over my name tag before moving on in search of big game. I just take the free food and enjoy the talks! Some of the other students I have met so far are pretty cool people. I do wish that some of the Assyriologists I actually know were here, because they are fun!

I am grateful for my efforts to learn other languages, too. This conference is genuinely trilingual (English, French, German) and, while I am far from total comprehension, I don't feel lost and upset either. Right now I am on lunch break writing this from a net cafe called Milk off of Rue St. Germain. Doesn't look like I will be a repeat customer, however, because the dude at the counter is a jerk! Also I hate French keyboards. On what planet should you have to hit shift to get a period but not to get an exclamation point? And that is only the beginning of the insanity.

Tonight I look forward to a reception and the chance to keep meeting other geeks!

Museum-a-thon

Today was the first Sunday of the month, which means that a number of the museums in Paris were free! Natalie and I took advantage of the situation by meeting up this morning at the Musee d'Orsay. Hundreds of other people had this idea also, but that didn't detract from the fun! The museum is set up in a former train station and has a very open feel.



The permanent exhibit is a treasure trove of paintings by Degas, Van Gogh, Cezanne, Monet, and my personal favorite Odilon Redon. It is absolutely lovely. Also on display were some of the silhouettes from the Chat Noir theater. In addition to lovely art, the museum also has a terrace with a fabulous view of the city -- you can see Sacre Coeur in the distance! (And, as you know, I much prefer it at a distance.)



After the lovely Musee d'Orsay, Natalie and I headed over to the Musee Rodin. The sculpture is beautiful, but the museum itself provides stiff competition. It's set in an old house surrounded by a tranquil garden decorated with famous works such as The Thinker.



I would go back to this museum just to hang out in the garden again.

Our final stop of the day was the Musee Picasso. While the Rodin museum was very stately, the one dedicated to Picasso had a funhouse feel that imitated his painting style. When you walk in, you first see a mirror set up to hazily reflect half of the building. It was fascinating to see so much of Picasso's work all in one place, and to talk through room after room of human figures arranged in such strange ways. There was also a cool set of photos of Picasso himself as he worked on a painting in his boxers. Did he have a great job or what?



I have to say I am very impressed by Paris's museums, not only because of what they display, but because every museum is a full experience that includes the actual space you occupy while looking around.

Opera!

Today, Eleanor (a friend from the language school) and I went to tour the Charles Garnier opera house. We were both Phantom of the Opera fanatics as kids so it was a particularly rewarding experience. The gaudy opulence of the building is unforgettable.



There are guided tours at 11:30 and 2:30 every day, although unfortunately the English language tour was sold out already when we arrived. So we decided to do French instead! Eleanor has actual experience with speaking and hearing French, so she caught a lot more of it than I did, but I was proud of myself anyway. Before the tour, we waited around in a large room with a mirrored ceiling.



Even though I couldn't understand most of what our tour guide was saying, she was obviously awesome. Her animated gestures and facial expressions not only helped me grasp what she was telling us, but indicated that she very much enjoys her job. I learned some interesting stuff -- such as that all of the costumes are made by hand, and that it takes an entire week to manufacture one tutu. And I kept imagining scenes from Gaston Leroux's book as I walked around. Apollo's lyre, the grand staircase, it was all there! I only regret that I did not ask our guide to point out Box 5 -- the Phantom's box -- when we were in the actual theater.



And of course, when people were not listening to opera, they were schmoozing in fancy ballrooms. Apparently there was one room for single men and couples, and another for single women. (Lame!) We were also told that the stairs in the building are deliberatly shallow because women were not supposed to show their feet -- although, as our guide quipped, ample cleavage was obviously okay.



The tour is a bit expensive (12 euros, 9 for students under age 26), but it's totally worth it. You get an hour and a half of entertaining commentary and a look at a very fascinating building. And I definitely got all nostalgic thinking about Phantom, which was my first musical.

Happy July 4 everybody!

Going Medieval

Yesterday after class, Natalie and I went to the Musee du Moyen Age, a very fine museum built into an abbey and the frigidarium of a Roman bath. There is a ton of awesome stuff to see, from reliquaries for pieces of the true cross to fabulous textiles, most famously The Lady and the Unicorn.



I also found the Holy Grail!



While medieval stuff is AWESOME, you can probably all guess that my favorite part of the museum was the part dedicated to Roman baths. They had all kinds of mirrors, makeup pots, and busts of women who obviously took their hair very seriously.



One of the funnest aspects of the museum for me was comparing the later European images of saints with the Coptic icons I got used to in Egypt. Let me just say that St. George gets to kill MUCH more awesome dragons in Egypt. What is that thing? A slug?



The demons, however, were in fine form yesterday!



As was this guy's derriere, if you like the "very defined" look...



Overall this museum is completely awesome, and I recommend you go if you ever get a chance. The artifacts are great, the displays are nice, and there are informative little cards in each room that give you interesting factoids. It is, however, extremely crowded, so be ready to wait if you want to get a close look, especially at smaller objects.